I am no different from every other woman. I desire to be married one day, but until then, I have learned to embrace my singleness. It is not always easy, but I am thankful for this gift God has given me at this stage in my life.
As a teenager and young adult, I never focused too much on dating or becoming deeply involved with young men I knew. I have always been young at heart and enjoyed the simple things in life. I wanted to have fun and be happy. At the time, it did not really seem to bother me, but as I grew into my twenties and now thirties, I began to question when “my time” would come.
I often hear about dating relationships and marriages unraveling. I used to think, “Oh, that will never happen to me. I will marry the perfect person.” I am grateful I no longer have this notion because, truly, there is no perfect person just as I am not a perfect person. I keep in mind that marriage requires a lot of hard work but is well worth the effort. I have observed many great examples of this, including my own parents, and I hope to follow in those same footsteps.
I am now in my early thirties. Sometimes, I still want to go the worried, desperate route. It is easy to look around and see “everyone else” dating, getting married, and starting families. That is also a desire of mine, but God gives me peace, knowing His timing is best, and I can trust Him completely. The past year, especially, has been a learning time for me. I realize that if God cares for the smallest things in my life which He has shown time and time again, then He definitely cares about my future.
Being single is one thing, but being a single young woman with spiritual and moral boundaries is quite another. Our society is bombarded with sexual images and messages of what we should look like. If a woman is not grounded in the truth of what God’s Word says, insecurities can easily take control and lead to unwise relationship choices. Three specific things continue to help me remain content:
1) Look for ways to encourage people. It does not take long to find someone who is hurting. We are surrounded by people who need a special touch and can bring hope to hurting and lonely hearts. I have found that when I reach out to someone in need, whether it is a physical, emotional, or spiritual need, I am encouraged and stop focusing on myself. These are some of the most fulfilling times in my life.
2) Pray for my husband. I know God holds my future, and it is bright. He sees the big picture. I find that when I pray specifically for my husband, it brings me peace, knowing God is preparing him for me. It may seem a little awkward or silly, but God knows his name. Sometimes I wonder if couples I know took time to pray for their spouse before they met. Some may have, but some may have rushed into marriage. I want to take advantage of the time I have and pray for my future husband. I know God blesses this, and I hope it provides an even stronger foundation for my marriage one day.
3) Have a thankful heart. I know that some of the things I do now I could never do if I were married or had children, and for that I am very grateful and happy to be in the place God has me at this time. When it is time for me to shift, He will lead, but I am choosing to move forward and enjoy my life, taking advantage of the gift of time and freedom God has given me…I may not always have it.
But I trust in You, Lord. I say, “You are my God.” My times are in Your hands. Psalm 31:14015
*Note: The author’s name is a pseudonym.