Melissa’s Story:
After eleven years of marriage and two children, I discovered my husband had broken his vows. One dark day, when my husband was out of town for work, I heard a woman’s voice in the background while I talked on the phone with him. Finally, he stopped denying his unfaithfulness. Separation and divorce followed.
I never imagined my marriage ending in divorce. Like many women, I anticipated marriage with hope and dreams of a lasting family. As a child of divorce, I admired strong marriages and believed I could protect mine.
But then my husband broke our vows.
Infidelity cut deep and shattered my trust. God had declared that husband and wife become one flesh in marriage, and one flesh doesn’t rip apart without searing pain. The betrayal felt as if someone had ripped an appendage from my body. The pain lodged in my chest, churned in my stomach, and stole my sleep.
I felt exposed, convinced the world could see my despair. In tears, I called my doctor, who prescribed anti-anxiety medication. It eased my racing heart and helped me sleep, but nothing could soothe the sting of abandonment. Household routines like mowing the lawn, cleaning, preparing meals, and getting the kids to school all reminded me of my former life. Grief, anger and guilt were my constant companions, even though I sometimes forced a smile for my children.
Loneliness worsened when I attended church. Many women I knew avoided me, seemingly unsure what to say. Some friends appeared uncomfortable around me, as if my broken marriage might rub off on them. Others, though meaning well, offered shallow advice that deepened my sense of isolation. The people I had hoped would welcome me like family often instead seemed to shine spotlights on my failure.
Then God sent a friend who had also walked through divorce. Erica taught first grade Sunday School, while I taught kindergarten. Something about her kind eyes and gentle smile made me feel safe. We chatted easily until one day I decided to open up to her. She listened without judgment while I disclosed the infidelity, the abandonment, and the shame I felt. She prayed with me and reminded me that God still had a future for me.
Erica invited me and my kids over for playdates with her children, and we all made pizzas and watched Christmas movies. Her home became my safe space, and her presence proved I had not been abandoned. She showed me, with her kindness, that healing could come. Through her friendship, I began to believe that God still saw me. He used her encouragement to remind me that he walked this road with me. Erica helped me believe that God’s love—not separation and divorce—defined me and proved my worth.
Over time, God reshaped the way I saw my circumstances. Instead of seeing only the wreckage, I noticed his rebuilding. He led me to other people who prayed and encouraged me and reminded me what was true. He gave me glimpses of joy in the laughter of my children and in the quiet assurance that he still had plans for me.
Most of all, God gave me a heart to encourage other women walking the same lonely road. Erica introduced me to one of her friends whose husband had just announced he was leaving her for another woman. Erica felt I could be a rock for her friend, just as Erica had been for me. I poured my heart into this new friend, and we soon developed a strong bond.
At my church, I began to lead a Single and Parenting small group for other single moms. God grew in me a deeper compassion and a willingness to sit with others in their sorrow, since I had come to understand the language of betrayal and grief. David used language of lament in many of the Psalms, such as 69:20: “Scorn has broken my heart and has left me helpless; I looked for sympathy, but there was none, for comforters, but I found none.” The language of the Psalms shows that believers can have joy even through hardship. Hope in Jesus’ presence is our anchor.
My story shifted from focus on loss to focus on the God who held me close through it all. Infidelity and divorce oddly became the very place where God revealed his faithfulness, strength, and nearness. And if he upheld me in the flames of trial, he can restore anyone who surrenders their broken pieces to him.
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