Did anyone care?
I can’t think of anything greater than knowing Christ and being known by Him. In my early Christian journey, I struggled with significance and importance. Due to repetitive rejection in my childhood and circumstances within my family, I felt pushed aside and ignored. Did anyone notice? Did anyone care? Did anyone truly know me or see me?
I often projected these emotions onto God. But He showed me in a special way He does hear me and knows my thoughts during the Christmas season. I wanted to buy gifts for my family and at the same time, experienced a lot of difficulty doing so because of my tight budget. Financial struggles became a huge mountain in my life at that time. I spent hours in the store, just trying to sort out the best gift for the lowest price.
While looking around I happened to come across these ornate eggs. They were jewelry boxes, and the most beautiful things I had ever seen. They even wound up and played music! I was greatly tempted to ruin my budget and buy myself one of the decorative eggs. After wrestling with the thought, I decided against the egg, and instead bought gifts for my family.
On my first day back to work since Christmas vacation, my boss handed me a gift. She said she was unable to give it to me before I left. When I opened the gift, I held in amazement the decorative egg I so admired in the store. I broke down immediately. God heard my thoughts! He knew I exercised restraint.
God alone knew about the egg. The egg represented more than a possession. The hand-picked gift provided evidence of His knowledge of my every thought and all my ways. I felt heard. I felt known. I experienced the intimacy I needed and sought.
God is with me at all times and in every circumstance. He knows me, He sees my struggles, and I am important to Him. I still have the egg today as a reminder of His unfailing love!
“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.” Psalm 139: 1-3